Bessie J

I do invest time in my mental health nor my physical health.

I have no career.

I am a full time carer that has to claim benefits.

I have no support which impacts my mental health.

I am stigmatized and judged by locals in a conservative council area where majority of locals are wealthy and married to offshore workers.

I am prescribed high doses of antidepressants and high blood pressure medication which causes drowsiness.

I feel trapped on medication and isolated as a shameful benefit claimer.

Ironically, the stigma of claiming benefits worsens my anxiety.

It's been nearly 10 years since I worked to earn. I am slightly more financially better off being a full time carer claiming benefits than I was working.

I feel completely worthless and useless.

I tried walks but I notice others when out in couples or purposely going somewhere.

I cannot afford to keep up with wealthy women in this town who have busy social lives and afford appts for hair and nails. and a personal trainer and holidays and pay for all the kids clubs and a car.

I have experienced being snubbed and excluded from school mum cliques.

Even my own grown up daughter and partner do not respect me due to not meeting their expectations of wealth through hard work.

I constantly fear for the future.

My daughter is naive and struggles with others. She is nearly 19 and never had a boy or girl friend. She does not show any want to move on in life.

She becomes overwhelmed easily in busy situations. I muster up the energy to care for her but that is draining me mentally.

We both physically sleep for most of next day after she has had a meltdown.

I'm worried sick about her and my benefits being removed due to politicians' decisions.

We take one day at a time and that is the best I can offer at present.