Zara N

The only mental health support I have been able to access for myself was anti-depressants, which my GP prescribed from a telephone appointment. I asked about receiving counselling and was told there was a wait list, I did not follow up on this and as a result didn’t receive the counselling. I am off anti-depressants thankfully, but I have been struggling with anxiety lately. Rather than contact the GP and probably be told there is a waiting list I have gone private through Better Health and funded it myself. I would rather make financial sacrifices, in order to help my mental health than wait for the NHS.

The problem with mental health support is that if you have to wait, your mental health suffers, which then impacts everything else. My son has recently suffered significant bereavements, my mum died in December 2022 and then his dad died in October 2023. I contacted his GP about getting support and was told they could only put in a referral for CAMHS, which again has a wait list, my son does not meet the criteria for CAMHS so that route was not available to us. My son’s paediatrician put in a referral to a charity called Winstons Wish, which helps children through close bereavements. The referral took 11 months before they were able to offer my son counselling, when I spoke with the counsellor it was decided that it was not appropriate for my son. My son is autistic and the counsellor said that their therapeutic model involved discussing the funeral and explaining the finality of death, I agreed this would cause more distress to my son.

My son and I have a faith in an afterlife, we do not prescribe to a particular religion and the counsellor said that they like to explain to the child that death is final, this does not align with mine and my son’s beliefs. I have explored private counselling options for my son, but he has said that he does not feel ready and is happier discussing his grief with me. I love my son dearly, and have supported and tried to help him any way I can through his grief, this has had an impact on my own mental health, which is why I am paying for private counselling for myself. If my son needed counselling now or in the future I would make financial sacrifices and pay privately.

I feel mental health treatment is not prioritised enough and the only thing that GPs offer to adults is anti-depressants and other medication. I feel the only time any mental health intervention is offered on the NHS, is if it reaches crisis point and there is a risk of serious harm to the individual or other people. I feel non-crisis mental health support is only available if you are willing to pay for it, which is not an option for many people.